Beginning of my dislike for church

I hated going to church growing up. I said this before but now I have to explain why. See we go to school Monday through Friday. We was suppose to have the weekend off . To me we really only had Saturday off because we went to church for like 8 hours on Sunday. Like 7 something to 4 because we were c.o.g.i.c. Now when we were younger we went almost  everyday but it slowed down. So 5 days out the week i happily go to school. I liked school. I made good grades & i had a decent amount of friends. But let's be honest. At the end of the day we were all being conditioned to think a certain way. Dress like, walk like, talk like this. You can't be successful if you don't. Brain washed if you will. I recognized it but what could i do ? 5 days out of the week I'm doing everything y'all tell me to do. I just wanted my 2 days off. But then we go to church. Now THEY telling me how I gotta be. You gotta talk like this to be saved. You gotta walk like this to be saved. If you don't come to church you going to hell. You wear that same dress every Sunday. Blah blah blah. I hated it. Then when you question something that they're teaching they say "well thats what the bible say baby". What kinda answer is that ? I mean just tell me you don't know. Then when we get outta church we only got like a few hours left to just relax before its off to bed early for school tomorrow. No weekend at all. I can't even have 2 full days to just think my own thoughts. To have a free mind. Cause when you really think about it, the pastor is telling you how HE  feels and what HE thinks about the bible. So you're only looking at his perspective & who says the way he sees it is the "right way". So I just did NOT want to go. I just was not trying to be in church all day listening to the same sermon I just heard last Sunday. Plus i was forced to go. My moma made us go and she ain't never go. We got sent with our grandma and she used to be there before church even started. Before it even opened, we was outside waiting for the other folks to come. So no, I never liked going to church. Will I ever go back ? I won't say I never will but now I'm enjoying my Sundays the way I want to.


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